The Funny Corner

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A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest inquired.
"They only know how to say, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?""
"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I taught to pray and read the bible.
My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."
"Thank you!" the woman responded.
The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.
The lady puts her female parrots in with the male parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?"
One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and exclaims,
"Put the beads away George, our prayers have just been answered!"
****************
A young man from the city went to visit his farmer uncle. For the
first few days, the uncle showed him the usual things -
chickens, cows, crops, etc. After three days, however, it was
obvious that the nephew was getting bored, and the uncle was
running out of things to amuse him
with. Finally, the uncle had an idea. "Why don't you grab a gun,
take the dogs, and go shooting?"
This seemed to cheer the nephew up, and with enthusiasm, off he
went, dogs in tow. After a few hours, the nephew returned. "How
did you enjoy that?" asked the uncle. "It was great!" exclaimed
the nephew. "Got any more dogs?"
**************
A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar getting soused. A man
comes in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on
this beautiful day getting drunk?"
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So what happened that's so horrible?
Farmer: Well, today I was sitting by my cow milking her. Just as
I got the bucket about full, she took her left leg and kicked over the bucket.
Man: Ok, but that's not so bad.
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So what happened then?
Farmer: I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left.
Man: and then?
Farmer: Well, I sat back down and continued to milk her. Just as
I got the bucket about full, she took her right leg and kicked over the bucket.
Man: Again?
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So, what did you do then?
Farmer: I took her right leg this time and tied it to the post on the right.
Man: and then?
Farmer: Well, I sat back down and began milking her again. Just
as got the bucket about full, the stupid cow knocked over the bucket with her tail.
Man: Hmmm...
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So, what did you do?
Farmer: Well, I didn't have any more rope, so I took off my belt
and tied her tail to the rafter. In that moment, my pants fell
down and my wife walked in.....

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